I can feel it creep up on me.
Slow subtle changes, only noticeable to me.
Irritable often,
Low energy,
Mind is in a fog,
I’m tired.
They don’t happen all at once.
It comes over time.
Good days and bad day in between.
Today?
Today was so-so.
I really just wanted to sleep all day.
I haven’t had my meds in about a month.
I can tell.
My body knows.
It isn’t that I depend on the meds.
Because I don’t.
In fact I fought like hell to not be on them.
I fought for years.
I finally gave in though.
Realized that maybe I couldn’t do it on my own.
I can feel a difference.

Today I reminded myself to breathe.
I reminded myself to enjoy the little things.
To try and stop fretting over the things I can’t control.
Easier said than done.
but I tried.

At least I can say I am trying.

My nephews made me laugh often.

They also were a bit ridiculous.

Connor has a crazy attitude.

Such a pain in the tush sometimes.

But SO funny.

Those boys are the loves of my life.

They keep me going.

They brighten up my day.

It melts my heart to hear Connor call for me.

Logan said “Aunty” for the first time yesterday. My heart did a happy dance.

Love them.

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