I feel like puking.
Tomorrow morning, I start student teaching.
I have to be confident.
I have to know what I am doing.
In reality, I have no fucking clue.
My insides are shaking. 
Something tells me that is not very good.
I know, this is what I went to school for…
But my school expects perfection.
It is a requirement.
Do they know me?
I lack perfection in a major way.
I am not super outgoing.
I am not super confident (not even a little).
I am not creative beyond belief,
and hard to believe, but it’s true?
I make mistakes!
I am not even fucking kidding you.
I am human.
I am trying to relax enough to go to sleep… not happening.
Today has been a ridiculous day.
The housing people are trying to put me in The Land of the Freshmen.
(it is a real place)
Are you fucking kidding me?! You ask me incredulously.
No people, I kid you not.
These people are not the brightest.
You see if they look at my academic history, they will realize that I am in fact NOT a freshman. 
In case they were confused, I had been writing in a previous email that I am a senior and graduating from college in December.
Ugh.
So I emailed them back… no reply…
I call them… no answer…
I leave a message, no call back.
What the fuck.
So tonight I am staying with the family babysit for.
They are so good to me.
They understand how traumatizing it could be to live in The Land of the Freshmen.
So, that is the latest story people.
Ok. I should go to bed.
Tomorrow I go to a class of 16 kindergarteners and pretend to know what I am doing.
I am so screwed.
Excuse me while I puke.

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